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Pink Feathers

English Vacation – Part Two

(continued…) Exhausted we partook in the obligatory shower in the communal shower block where people abandon all sense of style and privacy and rock up in nightwear some of dubious nature and shower in tiny wooden stalls next door to complete strangers in freezing cold water. Hardy, and not to be outdone, we ignore the cries of the children used to heated warmth and comfort and remind ourselves we are on a happy family holiday and hypothermic showers with a roomful of complete strangers is part of the joy!!!


Frozen and frigid we finally get into our tent after jamming and ripping the zipper and drawing blood. We snuggle down in our shiny, slippery rather cheap sleeping bags and for a moment there is a contented silence as we settle down.

Then comes the jittery legs from being so constricted in the way too narrow sleeping bags which due to the forsaking of the actual decent sleeping bags and choosing the discounted nylon ones we now find we are building up an alarming amount of static electricity!!!


As the park edges towards midnight all around are screaming kids, grumpy parents, the chorus of snoring fathers who hear none of it and are oblivious to the battles all around.

     The common theme of bribery is replaced with, “If you don’t stop we are going home right now!”      Which fails when all the kids agree this would be a good idea too. “You are ruining this for me….we won’t go swimming….we won’t do anything!”      Before finally the exhausted, exasperated, final warning… “We will never come on holiday again!”….

This cycle of madness is pretty much continued throughout the week in various degrees of utter despair mixed with moments of fond family memories …


…however brief…


As we neared the time to pack up we all felt sad and forlorn at the thought of leaving and going home. This is a typical English holiday. The best there is.


And, yes, we will do it all over again next year…


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