Over the past few weeks, I have been reminded of how many well-intentioned people can make you feel like a failure as a mom. Truth is, we really don’t need any help in that department as the feelings of failure continuously loom over us as we constantly question whether or not we are doing the right things for our kids.
Outsiders, family and friends can be so quick to judge – assuming they know what you go through and telling you in sometimes polite words and sometimes not, that you are an enabler, that you’re not a good parent or you’re not a good disciplinarian because maybe your son dropped out of high school, your daughter’s room is a complete disaster or maybe one of your kids has gotten into trouble with the law. Truth is, we all fall and fail in life – yes, even our kids – and as moms, all we can do is the best we can do.
Nobody knows the sleepless nights worrying and praying for their success and safety, spending countless hours helping them with their homework, navigating through bullies and first dates, or dragging them and their friends around town to keep them safe – making sure they have food, clothes and shelter over their heads, taking them to church, attending all their sports, joining the PTA and arguing with the school board for better education, or signing up as troop leader for the GirlScouts or BoyScouts. Wow, it never ends.
As moms in this network, we are here to hear your trials, tribulations and joys and share them with other moms so we don’t feel alone. So that we find connection and a place to share a rant, revelation, rhyme or reason without being judged, knocked down or told how to be a good parent. Nobody knows what you’ve been through or what you will go through, even the best intending people.
Don’t let others knock you down, Mamas. Don’t feel guilty or ashamed or a failure if your kids mess up. I think it’s not a matter of if they will mess up, but rather a matter of when. It’s inevitable and it’s safer for them to mess up when they’re still with you. It’s how we learn. It’s how we get back up on the horse, take the reins and push through life.
SO GIVE YOURSELVES A HUGE PAT ON THE BACKS FOR A JOB WELL DONE!!!! Because You ROCK, Mamas! And don’t you forget it! Let’s just enjoy the ride…
By: Darlene ‘Screamin’ Pistocchi