That's it! I'm done. Done with all this back and forth dieting! Why can't I just eat like a normal person? Why must I eat VOLUMES of food (notably pasta and chocolate) whenever I'm stressed?
I keep telling myself to go for a walk, get the yoga mat out and do some stretching, but all I do is sit on the couch with the remote with bowls of pasta followed by chocolate cake. It's the stress. I know it is. I need to take a deep breath before I dig in with the fork and realign my thoughts. I get so caught up in my own cycle, it's hard to see through the clouds.
The other option is to retire now and just start really living but then I'm sure I'll be stressed with finances. I've only got two more years, I can do this, right? I just have to focus. Stay focused on the end goal which is good and glorious, even though it will have mishaps of its own, but at least I will be doing everything I WANT to do not HAVE to do.
My family always tells me, stop psyching yourself out! You're almost there! Be proud of all you have done! One more class til I get my Masters and then I can move up the ladder and teach part-time at the college level, preferably online, and only two more years to officially retire! Then I can spend all my time working on ScreaminMamas, playing music, writing my novels, producing my cooking show... LOL... it's like my beautiful Aunt Jeannie tells me, "You've got a lot of living to do, Darlene!"Yes, I do!!
So starting now, the new motto is, I GOT THIS!!!!
Thank you for listening.
You can do this!!! 🙌